Are you making the right choices?
4 Villains of decision making
Every day you make a multitude of decisions in your mind. Should I wear this dress or not? Do I like this person? Should I exercise today?
Most of these decisions you make in an instant, but how confident are you in making decisions which radically change your life?
Being an organized, checklist kind of person, I almost often resort to a pro’s and cons list. Most of the time, I don’t even know if I made the right choice, or if other options exist. I just simply sit back and assume that I made the right choice and treat myself to a bar of chocolate, hoping for the universe to perform its miracle. But even then, I make absolutely horrible choices and I am sure most of you can relate.
So I researched on what stops us from making choices. This article summarizes the key concepts from the book Decisive by Dan and Chip Heath.
According to the book, there are 4 villains to decision making.
1. Narrow Framing
Most of the decisions in your life center on the either-or situation. Should I go to the dentist? Should I break up with my partner? Should I take this new job?
Think about it! Do you honestly think you only have two options in a situation? If this was the case, we would be mostly living a black and white Oscar Movie kind of life.
The either-or situation is what Psychologists called narrow framing. It is the tendency to define our choices too narrowly by seeing them on binary terms.
Any time you come across an either-or decision, always ask yourself what other options do I have?
2. Confirmation Bias
If I had a penny, for every time I bought a product because of confirmation bias, I wouldn’t be sitting here writing this blog.
Confirmation bias is our tendency to search for all the information that favors our belief while ignoring any information that devalues our belief’s.
Ever been in a situation when you have a rash on your skin and then you google for it and end up convinced that you have cancer?- Well, this is confirmation bias.
I like to think of confirmation bias as my brain’s way of rewarding me for my extensive detective work. Unfortunately, you are not a doctor nor a good detective and the sooner you understand better decisions you will make.
In short, go see a doctor rather than panicking your way into an anxiety attack.
After you have widened your options by googling your way into the dark realms of internet, take a moment to think if you are falling under the trap of confirmation bias.
3. Short Term Emotion
I recently ordered few furniture pieces from Wayfair and attempted to assemble them by myself (Yeah, wishful thinking). It turned out that the furniture was defective and Wayfair was kind enough to refund the entire money and asked me to throw away the furniture.
I quickly got excited and started browsing through Ikea to buy another set of furniture. But something bothered me, so I called my friend and tried to convince him why throwing away the furniture and buying another set was better for my emotional health.
Having known me for almost a decade, he remained passive and asked me to delay the purchase for another day. I did in order to shut him up, but the next day I got an idea to call someone professional to fix the slightly damaged furniture. In short, I hired a professional and got the defective pieces fixed rather than throwing the furniture away.
Moral of the story: Never decide when you are having an emotional high.
Too excited about the job? Why don’t you wait for a few days to decide how you feel about it? The heat of the moment is a powerful, dangerous thing.
One quick way to neutralize this is to distance yourself from the situation.
Take a shower, have a meal, go for a walk or talk to a friend.
4. Prepared to be wrong
Like most people, I panic at the thought of uncertainty. I have to be absolutely sure that things have to go according to my plan. But does it ever happen? If it does, life would be so unpredictable and boring.
Decisions are a truly fascinating construct. For one, we can only reap the aftermaths of our decisions in the future. That thought scares me. I often torture myself thinking what exact step or choice led me to where I am and I still don’t have answers.
Don’t let the thought of being wrong stop you from deciding. It could be the worst or the best thing in your life. But know that every one of us has a natural baseline to which we return irrespective of the outcome of our choice. So even if it turns out to the absolute worst, you can count on your resilience and strength to find your way back.
